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About Deviant Member i love to lose my mind24/Female/Australia Recent Activity
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Looking back you’ll understand why
this is the year they all write their songs about.

This is the year synonymous with love.

It’s all around you –
romantic and platonic and unrequited and
never-ending even in all its fleeting glory.
There are promises and forever’s
said with doubtless sincerity.
Friends are as good as family
until they betray you
and it hurts you more than any lover could.

This is the year of aching.

You lie awake at night thinking about the one –
you know the one – the one that will lead to your demise.
And so you go on dates with harmless sweethearts
with kind eyes and shy smiles
and try to forget.
And you’re thinking, You can kiss me if you want
(but I kind of hope you don’t).


This is the year you’ll miss the most.

When everything has settled down
and you feel like a human being
(and not a hormonal lunatic)
you’ll look back on it –
the way it made you laugh
the way it made you cry
the way it made you feel alive –

and you’ll miss it.
Seventeen.


We found wonderland, you and I got lost in it.
Life was never worse but never better.

-Taylor Swift

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Hello deviantARTists, it's been a long time.

I've had the urge to do a bit of thinking out loud (typing out....? whatever) and I've decided that this will be my chosen platform. I get a bit reflective towards the end of the year. Sometimes it feels like nothing is ever changing (I am sure you all know the feeling) and I find it helpful to look back and see that, yes, things are changing and yes, I am growing as a person. Today I've been thinking about where I am now and where I was two years ago. And it is, in fact, quite a different place:

In November 2012 I was twenty-two years old. I had just finished my bachelor of science and was about to enter my honours year. I was doing honours to avoid the fact that I didn't know what I wanted to be doing, but I felt a feeling of dread at the thought of spending my life as a researcher. I couldn't drive; I did not have a car. I didn't have any long-term friendships from uni (but I did have an acquaintance that would turn into a long-term friend). I felt pretty lost, really.

Now, two years later, I am twenty-four years old. (Congratulations to those math geniuses out there who figured that one out!) I have finished my first year (or two-thirds) of a masters degree of publishing and editing. I can drive, and I have a car that I love (a 2011 Toyota Corolla hatchback, if you're curious). I have a steady casual job as a publishing assistant. I am a volunteer for two different organisations, and I work with both on a weekly basis. I have a group of amazing friends from my honours year who blow my mind with their intelligence. I can talk on the phone and give presentations without stuttering (too much). I am looking for an internship for next year and I am excited about it. I am three days away from finishing Kayla Itsines' BBG, which I can assert is not easy.

So I guess things do change; and even someone with as much Peter Pan Syndrome as me grows up slowly. I still can't cook more than a couple of meals. I still can't iron. I still know next to nothing about finances. I still can't do a million other independent things. But that's okay.

I wonder where I will be in another two years' time. God willing, I will be twenty-six (yay more maths!). My studies should be over. Will I have a full-time job? Will I still be living at home? Will I have improved my housewife skills? I guess we will see. I'm terrified of the future, but I am also excited for it.

I wish I were still writing, but I've lost the unrequited part of my love and the bulk of my teenage angst and it seems I need at least one of those to write. Maybe I'll be back someday.

I hope you're all doing wonderfully, my old friends.
  • Mood: Content

deviantID

loopy-lexy
i love to lose my mind
Australia
Hello deviantARTists, it's been a long time.

I've had the urge to do a bit of thinking out loud (typing out....? whatever) and I've decided that this will be my chosen platform. I get a bit reflective towards the end of the year. Sometimes it feels like nothing is ever changing (I am sure you all know the feeling) and I find it helpful to look back and see that, yes, things are changing and yes, I am growing as a person. Today I've been thinking about where I am now and where I was two years ago. And it is, in fact, quite a different place:

In November 2012 I was twenty-two years old. I had just finished my bachelor of science and was about to enter my honours year. I was doing honours to avoid the fact that I didn't know what I wanted to be doing, but I felt a feeling of dread at the thought of spending my life as a researcher. I couldn't drive; I did not have a car. I didn't have any long-term friendships from uni (but I did have an acquaintance that would turn into a long-term friend). I felt pretty lost, really.

Now, two years later, I am twenty-four years old. (Congratulations to those math geniuses out there who figured that one out!) I have finished my first year (or two-thirds) of a masters degree of publishing and editing. I can drive, and I have a car that I love (a 2011 Toyota Corolla hatchback, if you're curious). I have a steady casual job as a publishing assistant. I am a volunteer for two different organisations, and I work with both on a weekly basis. I have a group of amazing friends from my honours year who blow my mind with their intelligence. I can talk on the phone and give presentations without stuttering (too much). I am looking for an internship for next year and I am excited about it. I am three days away from finishing Kayla Itsines' BBG, which I can assert is not easy.

So I guess things do change; and even someone with as much Peter Pan Syndrome as me grows up slowly. I still can't cook more than a couple of meals. I still can't iron. I still know next to nothing about finances. I still can't do a million other independent things. But that's okay.

I wonder where I will be in another two years' time. God willing, I will be twenty-six (yay more maths!). My studies should be over. Will I have a full-time job? Will I still be living at home? Will I have improved my housewife skills? I guess we will see. I'm terrified of the future, but I am also excited for it.

I wish I were still writing, but I've lost the unrequited part of my love and the bulk of my teenage angst and it seems I need at least one of those to write. Maybe I'll be back someday.

I hope you're all doing wonderfully, my old friends.
  • Mood: Content

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:icono-gosh:
O-Gosh Featured By Owner Oct 16, 2014
Hello Stranger :hug:
Thank you for the faves, Lovely :blowkiss:
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:icono-gosh:
O-Gosh Featured By Owner May 11, 2014
Happy Birthday, my beautiful girl :heart:
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:icono-gosh:
O-Gosh Featured By Owner Mar 26, 2014
Thank you so much for the fave, my lovely girl (with the best hair cut). :blowkiss:
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:iconanna-le16:
Anna-Le16 Featured By Owner Feb 26, 2014  Hobbyist General Artist
much love for the faves :love:
p.s i miss reading your work.
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:icono-gosh:
O-Gosh Featured By Owner Dec 26, 2013

I just read your poem from middle of last year - it is excellent.

But very sad. I am glad I haven't read it back than - I would have bothered you with all the concerned questions :hug:

Reply
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